Blonde Jokes

[Khaizerex]

[messylaura]

paddy stole a submarine , he sent a ransom note for 500 thousand pounds and a parachute

[Dixie]

Oh now I have to find out who is paddy

[messylaura]

well paddy is supposed to be the dim witted foe of the english, i guess the english have the irish as there dumd ass who gets it in the neck ,

just one of those things , blondes, the irish , you guys have rednecks ,

i remember when i was telling a simalar joke to a south africn freind , and they have a group of people regarded as thick , just different all over the world.
not that i have anything aginst the irish just that i didn't want to upset the blondes.

[Quercus]

Interesting point, messylaura.

When I was a kid their were 'moron jokes'. (Why did the moron throw butter out the window? Because he wanted to see butterfly.) However, I think that most people find that it's more fun to choose a specific group of people and insinuate that they're morons .


By the way Dixie...that was pretty funny.

[Dixie]

Thanks

[Dixie]

Two women were having lunch together, and discussing the merits of cosmetic surgery. The first woman says, "I need to be honest with you, I'm getting a boob job."

The second woman says "Oh that's nothing, I'm thinking of having my asshole bleached!"

To which the first replies, "Whoa, I just can't picture your husband as a blonde!"

[Khaizerex]

Heh..

[Angela]

[Dixie]

Three blondes are sitting by the side of a river holding fishing poles with the lines in the water. A Game Warden comes up behind them, taps them on the shoulder and says, "Excuse me, ladies, I'd like to see your fishing licenses."

"We don't have any." replied the first blonde.

"Well, if your going to fish, you need fishing licenses." said the Game Warden.

"But officer," replied the second blonde, "we aren't fishing. We all have magnets at the end of our lines and we're collecting debris off the bottom of the river."

The Game Warden lifted up all the lines and, sure enough, there were horseshoe magnets tied on the end of each line. "Well, I know of no law against it," said the Game Warden, "take all the debris you want." And with that, the Game Warden left.

As soon as the Game Warden was out of sight, the three blondes started laughing hysterically. "What a dumb Fish Cop," the second blonde said to the other two, "doesn't he know that there are steelhead in this river?!"

[Khaizerex]

[chi chi]

A blonde woman was driving her car home one night when she suddenly found herself in the middle of a really bad hail storm. The hail stones were as big as golf balls and her car gets dented up really bad. The next day she takes it in to a repair shop to have the dents looked at.

The repair guy noticing that she is blonde and quite dingy when she speaks, decides to have some fun and tells her to blow into the tail pipe of the car really hard when she gets home, and that doing this will cause all of the dents to pop out.

When she gets home she starts blowing into the tail pipe as hard as she can, over and over. Just then, her best friend who also is blonde shows up. Her friend sees her blowing into the tail pipe and is quite startled by the action. She blurts out all flippantly, "What are you doing!?"

She tells her the repair guy told her to blow into the tail pipe real hard and the dents would pop out. Her girlfriend says, "Duh! You need to roll up the windows first!"

[Don't Blink]

Hi Blondie

[Khaizerex]

[Blondie]

Hi Don't Blink

Are you having trouble getting the tast of the tailpipe out of your mouth

[Dixie]

Tthere was a guy sitting next to a blond on a plain. he decided to have some ffun. he asked the blond if they could play a game. the blond said sure i love games. so the man said we will ask each other question. and if you get it right i will give you ten dollars and if you get it wrong or don't knowe the answer than you give me ten dollars and we will just go back and forth.the blond said she didn't want to play. then about 20 minutes later the guy says o.k. i will give you one hundred dollars if i don't know the question. the blond finally said o.k. and they started the game. who is the ruler of africa? asked the man. the blond handed him a ten dollar bill. then the blond asked what is black and white and purple has eight legs runs like a lion barks lke a dog and has red eyes? the man then got out his lap top and looked on the enternet he and emailed his friends. after about an hour he handed the lady a hundred dollar bill. then he asked what was it anyway and the blond handed him a ten.

[telboy]

Thats a classic

[Dixie]

Q:why is a blondes casket always shaped like a Y

A:because when you lay them down their legs open

[Dixie]

sorry

[Dixie]

A blond was a house keeper an old man's house he asked her to have sex with him and she said no because she wanted him to get tested for HIV first, so he did. He brought back the results and he came out negative. She had sex with him and when they were done, he said so i guess blondes aren't really that stupid, and she says yeah i just didnt want to get HIV twice.

[Dixie]

Two blondes are standing on either side of a small river. One yells to the other "how do you get to the other side?" The other yells back "Duh, your already on the other side!"

[Dixie]

One day a man was mowing his lawn and his very attractive blonde neigbor girl came outside and checked her mail and slammed her mailbox shut. 3 minutes later she came back out opened her mailbox and this time mumbled to herlself and slammed it shut again. 5 minutes after that she came out again and slammed it shut again so finally the man asked her why she kept checkin her mail and slamming it shut and she replyed by saying "My stupid computer keeps saying YOU GOT MAIL!!"

[Khaizerex]

[Khaizerex]

sorry

I don't understand what the "sorry" is for...