Farmer and Little Boy

[Dixie]

There was this farmer, sitting on the front porch of his house this one hot summer day, when this kid comes walking down the road carrying this big bundle of wire.
'Hey kid!' the farmer says. 'Where ya goin' with that wire?'

'Well,' the kid drawls, 'this here ain't just any ol' wire, this here's chicken wire -- I'm fixin' to catch me some chickens!'

'You can't catch chickens with chicken wire!'

'Sure I can!' he yells and takes off down the road. He comes back at the end of the day and sure enough, he's got a whole mess of chickens caught in this chicken wire.

Well, the farmer's sitting on his porch the next day, and the same kid comes walking down the lane, carrying a big roll of tape. 'Hey kid!' the farmer yells. 'Where ya goin' with that tape?'

'Well, this here ain't just any ol' tape, this here's duck tape -- I'm fixin' to catch me some ducks!'

'You can't catch ducks with duct tape!'

'Sure I can!' the kid says, and takes off down the road. He comes back at the end of the day and again, the farmer can't believe his eyes. The kid had a whole bunch of ducks all wrapped up tightly in his tape.

The next day the farmer's sitting on his porch again, and the kid comes walking down the road carrying a stick.

'Hey kid!' the farmer says. 'Where ya goin' with them flowers?'

'Well, this here ain't just any old flowers, this here's pussy willow.'

'Hang on,' the farmer says, 'I'll get my hat.'