the baptism

[NAS]

A drunk stumbles along a baptismal service on Sunday afternoon down by the river. He proceeds to walk down into the water and stand next to the Preacher.

The minister turns and notices the old drunk and says, "Mister, Are you ready to find Jesus?" The drunk looks back and says, "Yes, Preacher. I sure am."

The minister then dunks the fellow under the water and pulls him right back up. "Have you found Jesus?" the preacher asked.

"No, I didn't!" said the drunk.

The preacher then dunks him under for quite a bit longer, brings him up and says, "Now, brother, have you found Jesus?"

"No, I did not Reverend."

The preacher in disgust holds the man under for at least 30 seconds this time brings him out of the water and says in a harsh tone, "My God, have you found Jesus yet?"

The old drunk wipes his eyes and says to the preacher..."Are you sure this is where he fell in?"

[Maxie]

A man is stumbling through the woods, totally drunk, when he comes upon a preacher baptizing people in the river. He proceeds to walk into the water and subsequently bumps into the preacher. The preacher turns around and is almost overcome by the smell of booze. But, he still manages to ask the drunk, "Are you ready to find Jesus?"

The drunk answers, "Yes,I am."

So the preacher grabs him and dunks him in the water. He pulls him up and asks the drunk, "Brother have you found Jesus?"

The drunk replies, "No, I haven't found Jesus."

The preacher, shocked at the answer, dunks him into the water again but for a little longer this time. He again pulls him out of the water and asks again, "Have you found Jesus, my brother?"

The drunk again answers, "No, I haven't found Jesus."

By this time, the preacher is at his wits end so he dunks the drunk in the water again --- but this time he holds him down for about 30 seconds.

When the drunk begins kicking his arms and legs, the preacher pulls him up.
The preacher asked the drunk again, "For the love of God, have you found
Jesus?"

The drunk wipes his eyes and catches his breath and says to the preacher,
"Are you sure this is where he fell in?"

[Dirtzinert]

I'm gonna be in Hell, about 7:15...what time are you arriving?

[Sting]

Been there.

[wewe008]

God fell in the wrong place

[cerina]

One Sunday afternoon, a drunk stumbles into a baptismal service down by the river.

He staggers into the water and stands next to the minister, who turns, notices the old drunk and says, 'Mister, are you ready to find Jesus?'
The drunk looks back and says, 'Yes sir, I am.'
The minister then dunks the fellow under the water and pulls him right back up.
'Have you found Jesus?' the Minister asks.
'No, I didn't!' says the drunk.
The minister then dunks him under for a quite a bit longer, brings him up and says, 'Now, brother, have you found Jesus?'
'No, I did not!' says the drunk again.
Disgusted, the minister holds the man under for at least thirty seconds this time, brings him up and demands, 'For the grace of God, have you found Jesus yet?!'
The old drunk wipes his eyes and pleads, 'Are you sure this is where he fell in?'

[mid_nite_poet]

Do you think he may give up drinking now?

[Spirit of Desire]

i realy should say something clever

but seems to cover it nicley

[mr wiseguy]

Do you think he may give up drinking now?

no i still have a drink

[tsr]

A man is stumbling through the woods totally drunk when he comes upon a preacher baptizing people in the river. The drunk walks into the water and subsequently bumps into the preacher.. The preacher turns around and is almost overcome by the smell of booze. Whereupon he asks the drunk, 'Are you ready to find Jesus?'

'Yes I am' replies the drunk, so the preacher grabs him and dunks him in the river. He pulls him up and asks the drunk, 'Brother have you found Jesus?'

The drunk replies, 'No, I haven't.' The preacher, shocked at the answer, dunks him into the water again, but for a bit longer this time. He pulls him out of the water and asks again, 'Have you found Jesus, my brother?'

The drunk again answers, 'No, I have not found Jesus.'
By this time the preacher is at his wits end so he dunks the drunk in the water again, but this time he holds him down for about 30 seconds.

When the drunk begins kicking his arms and legs, the preacher pulls him up. The preacher asks the drunk again, 'For the love of God, have you found Jesus?'

The drunk wipes his eyes and catches his breath and says to the preacher,



'Are you sure this is where he fell in?

[mid_nite_poet]

[cerina]

That's one of my favourite jokes.

[mugley]

[johno]

awe, c,mon folk,s your talking here about the man that walked on water..

[mid_nite_poet]

[johno]

A Glaswegian is stumbling through the woods, totally drunk, when he
comes upon a preacher baptising people in the river. He proceeds to
walk into the water and subsequently bumps into the preacher....
The preacher turns around and is almost overcome by the smell of
alcohol, hereupon he asks the drunk,

'Are you ready to find Jesus?'
The drunk shouts, 'Aye, I am.' So the preacher grabs him and dunks
him in the water. He pulls him up
and asks the drunk, Brother have you found Jesus?' The drunk
replies, 'No, Ah havnae found Jesus.'
The preacher shocked at the answer, dunks him into the water again for
a little longer. He again pulls him out of the water and asks again,
'Have you found Jesus me brother?' The drunk again answers, 'No, Ah
havnae found Jesus.'

By this time the preacher is at his wits end and dunks the drunk in
the water again ---

but this time holds him down for about 30 seconds and when he begins
kicking his arms and legs he pulls him up.

The preacher again asks the drunk, 'For the love of God have you found
Jesus?'


The drunk wipes his eyes, catches his breath and says to the preacher,






'Are you sure this is where he fell in?