Thought for today

[mid_nite_poet]

Possibility

[mr wiseguy]

whens palm sunday

[mid_nite_poet]

Every Sunday for most

[mr wiseguy]

shit another 6 days to go

[mid_nite_poet]

You'll survive

[mr wiseguy]

A wife is a sex object. Every time you ask for sex, she objects.

[mr wiseguy]

Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don’t.

[mugley]

[mugley]

imagesthought-small.jpg

[cerina]

Works for me every time.

[mid_nite_poet]

Works for me too..

[mid_nite_poet]

A life spent making mistakes is not only more
honorable but more useful than a life
spent doing nothing.

-- George Bernard Shaw

[Ice Queen]

A life spent making mistakes is not only more
honorable but more useful than a life
spent doing nothing.

-- George Bernard Shaw

Like, whatever George!

[mid_nite_poet]

Have you ever wondered if the one dollar bills in your wallet were ever in a stripper’s butt crack?

[mugley]

[mid_nite_poet]

Women are like phones:

They like to be held, talked to, and touched often.

But push the wrong button and your ass is disconnected.

[mugley]

ain't that the truth

[mugley]

A little known fact....
The first testicular guard "Cup" was used in Hockey in 1874 and the first helmet was used in 1974.

It took 100 years for men to realize that the brain is also important.

[mid_nite_poet]

[kingray]

duh

[cerina]

Or to realise where the brain was centred.

[mid_nite_poet]

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY

Have you ever wondered if the one hundred dollars in your wallet were ever in a strippers butt crack?

If not, you're wondering now.

[mugley]

one can only hope ( damn inflation is bad, it was a dollar a few days ago)

[mid_nite_poet]

A few random thoughts

Love means never having to ask, "Does that fifty include a spanking

***
My mom was a ventriloquist and she always was throwing her voice. For ten years I thought the dog was telling me to kill my father.

***
I prefer Hostess fruit pies to pop-up toaster tarts because they don't require so much cooking

***
When I was young, I wrote a letter to Santa every year and he always brought me what I wanted.

Now that I'm an adult, I have my children write similar letters to Santa, but the lazy bastard never brings them anything.

***
If you enjoy your alcohol, remember this: If you put your old, rotten liver under your pillow, the Beer Fairy will leave you a keg.

***
Q: What does an atheist say when she's having an orgasm?
A: "Darwin! Oh, Darwin!"

***
I bought a dog the other day...I named him Stay. It's fun to call him...'Come here, Stay! Come here, Stay!' He went insane. Now he just ignores me and keeps growling when I come near him.

***
A Stanford Medical research group advertised for participants in a study of obsessive-compulsive disorder. They were looking for therapy clients who had been diagnosed with this disorder. The response was gratifying; they got 300 responses
the day after the ad came out.

All from the same person.

***
If you're singing Christmas songs on your neighbor's lawn at night with your church group, it's called "caroling."

But if you're doing it alone with no pants on, it's called "drunk and disorderly."